Memorials

Well, I'm in the home stretch before it's time for camp...I head out on Friday, which means I need to spend this week organizing and packing up my stuff for the summer. It's hard to believe it's already time for this; I feel like last summer just ended! But on the other hand, I'm getting almost giddy with excitement...Friday can't come soon enough!

So today is Memorial Day. Yesterday in church we had a supply pastor filling the pulpit because our pastor is continuing education in Georgia or something. And yesterday had two possible directions it could've gone in: Ascension Day or Memorial Day. We went the Memorial Day route.

Ugh.

I'll clarify the "ugh." I put a lot of stock in Memorial Day. I have a lot of important people to remember today. I'll go visit a grave, I'll take flowers, I'll remember my loved ones. I know that, traditionally, this day is meant to honor veterans and their sacrifice for our country - I'm fine with that too. It's important to remember the cost of war (though I think it's quite telling of our culture that we find it so easy to forget that cost - casualties from both sides, that is). Here's where Memorial Day get's mucky for me: when it becomes GOD BLESS AMERICA (AND NO WHERE ELSE) Day.

The pastor who preached yesterday didn't really hammer that point home, for which I'm grateful. However, he spent little to no time discussing scripture and a whole lot of time talking about remembering the cost of freedom. You want to talk about that? Fine! But don't do it from the pulpit. God's heart breaks for our lost ones as much as it breaks for the soldiers on the other side of the line. We're not a country executing vigilante justice, or the swift hand of our angry God. We're a nation of broken people, who ask for God's blessing because of our brokenness. Not because of our awesomeness. So when we spend our Sundays contemplating how our nation is out there "puttin' a boot in the ass" of terror, I think we're focusing on the wrong thing.

We should ask God to bless America because we, like all people, need God's blessing. Not because we're the only country in this world who's finally got it right. Because...well, we haven't.


ANYWAY. I'm probably preaching to the choir on that one, but whatever. Now I'm going to go enjoy my Memorial Day! I have loved ones to remember, and loved ones to be with. I hope you can do the same :)

A Disciple's Renewal

O My Savior, help me.
I am so slow to learn, so prone to forget, so weak to climb;

I am in the foothills when I should be in the heights;
I am pained by my graceless heart,
my prayerless days,
my poverty of love,
my sloth in the heavenly race,
my sullied conscience,
my wasted hours,
my unspent opportunities.

I am blind while light shines around me:
take the scales from my eyes,
grind to dust the evil heart of unbelief.

Make it my cheifest joy to study thee,
meditate on thee,
gaze on thee,
sit like Mary at thy feet,
lean like John on thy breast,
appeal like Peter to thy love,
count like Paul all things dung.

Give me increase and progress in grace so that there may be;
more decision in my character,
more vigor in my purposes,
more elevation in my life,
more fervor in my devotion,
more constancy in my zeal.

As I have a position in the world,
keep me from making the world my position;

May I never seek in the creature what can be found only in the creator;

Let not faith cease from seeking thee until it vanishes into sight.

Ride forth in me, thou king of kings and lord of lords,
that I may live victoriously,and in victory attain my end.

That's a prayer that I've read about a million times, and every time it never ceases to strike at the heart of what I should be seeking. I like liturgy and other written prayers because, more often than not, someone else can articulate what I'm feeling better than I can.

Persecution, the Church...and Watercolor

It's Sunday! And I went to a different church this morning (I do that a lot - mostly because I'm not here much on the weekends, so I don't really have a "church home" here)

Sadly, the service I attended today set my teeth on edge. I'm not sure if I my response is entirely justified or Biblical; sometimes my personal values and beliefs cloud what is true. But sometimes I think my response is grounded in truth...and I think today that was the case.

Now, I'm SURE this church is rooted in the Bible. They are brothers and sisters in faith. They seek after the Lord. They want to love Him and serve Him; I acknowledge that wholeheartedly. But today's sermon frustrated me in many ways. The preacher spoke on the passage in John where Christ warns his disciples of persecution due to their faith (the end of chapter 15 and the first few verses of 16). The crux of the sermon was that we, as American Christians, are persecuted by those who hate the faith - particularly those in our government. There was lots of talk about things like pro-life pastors being arrested for protesting, laws being passed that "attacked the faith" and so forth. The pastor suggested that we should all be memorizing scripture not because it is important to have the Word in our hearts, but because one day (possibly soon!) being a Christian may be illegal in our nation.

What.

To suggest that the greatest dangers facing the American Church today come at the hands of our government is foolishness, to me. That kind of religious-right agenda puts a bad taste in my mouth, and in the mouths of many. Sure, there is merit to discussing issues like abortion - but there is much more than just that.

The American Church (oh what a varied body she is!) cannot wallow in its "persecution." We cannot point fingers at atheists, or pro-choice people, or our government. The dangers facing our church are much deeper and much closer to home than that. The dangers in our church come from within - from apathy, complacency, from being satisfied with the status quo. They come from our culture of consumption, entitlement and me-first-me-only thinking. They come from alienating others with a message of hate, or - on the other side - from being passive and postmodern in our approach to the gospel.

There is so much work to be done. Work that goes beyond mailing postcards of fetuses to senators. Work that involves loving others, not shouting at them. And even if I don't share the views of this church (I'm one of those Demi-crats, you know), I am as much a part of the problem. I know that I fail to meet the demands of the gospel. I am broken, too.

That being said...the rest of my Sunday has been enjoyable! And really, even If i don't agree with that church on that, it gave me something to think about. And that's a good thing. After church I had lunch with my roommate and some of her friends, and I just finished a watercolor!



See, there it is! I was really nervous about watercolor before I started this semester. I'm an oil painter usually, and the method is very, VERY different. But I'm starting to get the hang of it, which makes it much more enjoyable, that's for sure.

So now I'm just going to enjoy the rest of my Sabbath. I might make some granny squares, or do a crossword, or call a friend. It's a nice, snowy day to enjoy.